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Mia and Lily

mia and broooklin girlsLet me tell you a little about my daughter Mia, born last she’s our third daughter and our baby. She’s always been our sweet one, shy, fearful. She has anxiety, not the normal type but the type that gets in deep and controls your life. She obsesses about small things.  If you know anything about Mia you know a few things, the first thing is that she loves baby dolls. Mia fell in love with her first baby doll a few years ago, she was just a baby at the time too.

That leads us to our life now, see Mia still loves her baby. Lily is her name and she is Mia’s world. When Mia goes to the pool, Lily goes to the pool. When Mia gets sunblock, Lily gets sunblock. When Mia eats, Lily always gets a bite first. When I tuck Mia into bed I tuck in Lily, when I look for Mia I look for Lily, when I’m at the grocery store I keep tabs on Lily. I even get to buckle her into the seat of the car.  That’s what you do for the people you love.mia and lilyA few weeks ago while on vacation Mia brought Lily to the pool. The other little girls at the pool spotted Lily with Mia, as little girls usually do when Mia takes Lily anywhere the other girls all wanted to play with Lily.

At the pool one little girl said to Mia “Let me see Doc McStuffin’s, let me play with Doc” and so that day while everyone else wanted to play with Doc our little Mia was very upset. Upset because the other girls did not know that she is Lily and they were just throwing her around the pool as if she were nothing. In Mia’s world this was everything.  Mia upset tells me “They keep calling Lily Doc and she’s not Doc McStuffin’s. She is Lily, my doll Lily and I love her and they can’t play with her.”mia and brooklin san diegoSo that day, I didn’t tell Mia she had to share. I allowed her to hold Lily close and they played in the pool together. Mia singing songs to Lily, the two of them seemingly in their own little world.  That afternoon she shared her dessert with Lily too, and as always Lily took a bite first.

That day like many other before I did talk to my children about the importance of loving one another, and their friends. We talked to Mia about why the other girls assumed that Lily was Doc McStuffin’s. In the last week there have been several more senseless shootings of African American’s in this country. Yesterday when my friends were in tears asking for help, asking for our whiteness and asking us all to just say that this needs to stop I wanted to tell everyone about Mia and Lily and the friendship they have.

People say all the time that they want their children to change the world. What I want each and every one of you to know is that the children we are raising will change the world. We are writing history books and it takes every single mother, father, uncle, auntie, Grandparent, whomever you are. It takes you opening your heart to not just a shy little white girl and her doll Lily but to the little girls and boys that look like Lily. It takes removing your ideals and expectations for what you think people should be like, and seeing them for who they are a loving father, a mother an auntie or a friend. It will not be easy, the work we have to do is heavy, but we have to start now. We have to talk to our loved ones, our friends, our neighbors, we have to talk to our children.

You see my wish for your children is that they find a love as deep as Mia’s and Lily’s.


  1. Tiffany Hathorn on July 11, 2016 at 1:49 pm

    Honestly, my first thought when I saw Lily was that it’s nice that your daughter loves a Black doll so much. It goes to show that children may notice race, but they don’t see anything wrong with someone looking different than they do. My biggest hope is that no one teach them otherwise. I also love that she gave her doll a name that she wanted. I also see nothing wrong with letting her hold on to her doll when she got upset. Kids should learn to share but I don’t think we should expect to share everything at all times. After all, we have things that we may not want everyone else to touch.

  2. CourtneyLynne on July 11, 2016 at 8:05 am

    Awwwww I love that your daughter carries around her doll like
    That!!! I had a doll I loved like that when I was little. I can only hope kids learn love. I do believe if we teach our kiddos these values the world will eventually be filled with it!

  3. Lynndee on July 11, 2016 at 6:26 am

    This is such a heartwarming post…love it! I always teach my son about respect because I do believe that if there’s respect, everything else follows.

  4. Ann Bacciaglia on July 10, 2016 at 7:52 pm

    We all come into the world color blind. It is such a shame when kids are taught to hate because of the color of someones skin. We all need to help each other as humans.

  5. Angela Kanellopoulos on July 10, 2016 at 11:20 am

    Awe that is so adorable. I love this post! Your girls are so adorable. The love between and little girl and her doll is just amazing.

  6. April Mims on July 10, 2016 at 10:07 am

    The world could definitely use a lot more love, respect and caring right now. I did my best to raise my girls that way and pray that others see the need for it.

  7. diana ajih on July 9, 2016 at 2:36 pm

    Beautiful story about your daughter. I agree that it all starts with raising your kids to be respectful and compassionate human beings because they are our future. Even though the world seems a lot scarier caused by all the hate crimes, terrorism, gun violence, police violence, and etc., I’m hopeful things will get better and I wish to still be alive when that happens. Thanks for this amazing post.

  8. Jeanine on July 9, 2016 at 7:35 am

    love this! teaching kids all about compassion, respect and understanding is what it is ALL about! It’s our jobs to make sure they are taught properly and as of right now its even more important!

  9. Kelly Hutchinson on July 9, 2016 at 3:13 am

    Great post. It is so important to teach our kids respect, understanding, and compassion. It is definitely lacking in the world today.

  10. Christy Garrett on July 8, 2016 at 9:30 pm

    This is an awesome story. I agree that I wish more people who love rather than assume. I know I have personally touched lives by a smile, breakfast, a handful of change.

    It’s a sad world and last night’s shootings in Dallas is very close to home.

  11. lisa on July 8, 2016 at 8:57 pm

    What a great story. It just goes to show that our kids don’t care what color you are. I just wish us adults were the same.

  12. Two boys and a hubby on July 8, 2016 at 8:41 pm

    What a beautiful little girl and I love that she cares so much for Lily. I can only pray the world gets better it seems to be getting scarier everyday.

  13. Karissa on July 8, 2016 at 3:19 pm

    I believe in our future generations! Things will get better! Thanks for a lovely post.

  14. Stacie @ Divine Lifestyle on July 8, 2016 at 6:41 am

    I love this post! Of course, it’s important to raise children with a mindset of making the world around them a better place. However, that mindset comes from a place of deep love of family and their fellow human beings.

  15. Dogvills on July 8, 2016 at 12:39 am

    Mia is such a pretty little girl. You are so right about his. We should teach our children to love and respect each other.

  16. Amanda Acuna on July 7, 2016 at 3:10 pm

    I completely agree with you! We need to be raising children who love and respect each other!