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Goodbye Fat Girl

For the past 5 years I have battled with my weight. It all started shortly after I started being harassed online by an ex-friend. I turned to food and  it made me happy. For years I would drown my anxiety in sweets and sadly I allowed food to control me. Three years ago I decided that I wasn’t going to let anyone control my feelings and my emotions. I wasn’t going to allow a stranger to dictate my life for me, or affect my family any further. So I put on my non-running Nike sneakers and went for it. I completed my first 5K and proved to myself that I could do it. I lost 50 pounds that years and I was well on my way to saying goodbye to that fat girl forever.

Then after a lovely vacation with my husband we found ourselves expecting our third child. It was that second pregnancy that left me so out of shape. I went from 145 pounds to 235 pounds (at that time the harassment was the worst) and that year my baby was born at 10 pounds. I was so unhealthy during that pregnancy that I didn’t know it would cause later health problems. They say that moms who give birth to 10 pound babies are more likely to have gestational diabetes and in my third pregnancy I found myself checking blood sugar levels. My world became once again consumed with food, everything I could have, everything I couldn’t. It was all about counting carbs and making sure I had enough protein. I gained 24 pounds during my third pregnancy but also found I had extreme round ligament pain. After 17 weeks of pregnancy I stopped running and stuck with minimal exercise and a strict diet. I learned a lot from having gestational diabetes.

After Mia was born I was even more determined to get in better health. Having a taste of diabetes I never want to go through that again. I want to run that half marathon – I will run that half marathon.

Yesterday I posted this photo of me in my size 8 jeans. I haven’t worn these jeans in two years. I’ve lost 36 pounds since January 1st and I’m excited about this summer. I’m excited about being able to keep up with my children, and running with the sun beating on my shoulders. I’m excited about swimming for hours in the pool and enjoying crisp fresh fruit. I’m excited about the future.

I remember last year when I tried to put on these jeans and they wouldn’t even go up my legs let alone zip and look decent. I remember thinking to myself – what if they never fit? 

Then I rededicated myself to my health. I fell in love with Zumba again and found that dancing is my meditation. It’s help me re-find my hips and I’m so grateful for music. I’m grateful for the other women who dance along side me because they inspire and push me to keep going. I realize now that I enjoy feeling my heart beat and the sweat dripping down my back. I enjoy running 5 miles and challenging myself even further.

I’ve said goodbye to the fat girl. I will never again see her but I realize that – that person taught me many things. 

53 pounds later.

I’m looking forward to the future for each day brings new things. New challenges, new memories to enjoy and new moments to be a part of. I hope that if you are on your weight loss journey you know that  if you work hard today you will have a brighter tomorrow.  That if you find something you truly enjoy doing you will be happy.

 

Follow your bliss.

And I’ll follow mine. 

22 Comments

  1. MaryAnn on June 2, 2013 at 9:40 pm

    Amazing job on the weight loss. I am currently pregnant with baby #2 and I haven’t lost the weight from baby #1. This is inspiration for me to lose the weight after little girl is born.



  2. francine on June 1, 2013 at 2:53 am

    great job.



  3. Terri K (@tkharmonic) on May 30, 2013 at 2:51 pm

    I’m so happy for you and for your family. I’m battling weight like I’ve never had in my life, and am concerned about my health because I need to be strong and healthy so I can be around for my son. He’s only 11 and I need to get control of myself so I can be around to watch him grow up.



  4. courtney b on May 29, 2013 at 6:18 pm

    wow congrats you look amazing 🙂 you are super mom for sure!



  5. Lisa E on May 27, 2013 at 7:30 pm

    good for you for losing all that weight. At 36 i’m struggling with the weight, thank god for breastfeeding but i fear what will happen when i stop…. no more ice cream 🙁



  6. Olivia Rubin on May 25, 2013 at 7:16 pm

    How wonderful that you are taking control of your life a d not allowing food and outside personalities to dictate your daily life. That your children will grow up with a healthy mom that is active and proud of herself and will lead by example.

    I am currently up to 2.7 miles and week 8 of the couch to 5k. I can’t imagine running 5 miles…that’s wild!



  7. Blessie Nelson on May 23, 2013 at 2:33 pm

    so proud of what you achieved! Do maintain it now!!



  8. Tiff @ Babes and Kids on May 22, 2013 at 9:12 pm

    You look SO great Kristin and you are the prime example that hard work and good eating pays off. It’s amazing how different your face looks too. You are amazing! 🙂



  9. Brutus Duffy on May 22, 2013 at 6:20 pm

    You look fabulous! I agree with everyone that you are an inspiration.



  10. Bekah Kuczenski on May 22, 2013 at 6:18 pm

    Wow! Congrats on losing sooo much weight! That is hard work and you should be so proud of yourself!!



  11. kristin on May 22, 2013 at 7:08 am

    Congratulations, you look awesome!



  12. Denise L on May 22, 2013 at 6:26 am

    Congratulations! You’re such an inspiration!



  13. Julie on May 21, 2013 at 12:50 pm

    Thank you so much for that! I’m definitely in need of some inspiration to become more fit and lose the baby weight!



  14. Lisa @ Crazy Adventures in Parenting on May 21, 2013 at 12:23 pm

    GO YOU!!!



  15. Hanan on May 21, 2013 at 12:04 pm

    That is awesome!! You look great, girl. Still just as beautiful!!



  16. Jennifer on May 21, 2013 at 11:10 am

    you are amazing!! I seriously want to get into shape and I look in the mirror and I just hate certain parts of me. But when it comes time to work out I just… don’t. Go you girl! Love your will power and your focus



  17. Marina on May 21, 2013 at 11:07 am

    Great going! Keep at it. You’re looking great! 🙂



  18. Emily on May 21, 2013 at 11:06 am

    I am battling my own weight battle so I can totally relate to letting food control you. You have given me hope that I can and will fit into my skinny jeans again



    • Kristin on May 21, 2013 at 11:09 am

      I should admit that I still love food, but now I’ve learned to enjoy food that is good for you. I know that food fuels your body and it’s changed the way I look at and enjoy the food that I eat.

      You can do anything you set your heart to do Emily!!



  19. Courtney on May 21, 2013 at 11:06 am

    Great job girl! It’s been fun to follow your journey! It feels so good to reclaim life and youth with getting fit! So excited for you! Great things to come! 🙂



  20. The Mom Jen on May 21, 2013 at 11:03 am

    What an inspiration! You look amazing!



  21. rebecca norton on May 21, 2013 at 10:57 am

    you are doing such a great job!!